The History of a misunderstood masterpiece | 'Honey I'm Home' - GHOST ft. DEX
GHOST categorized this piece as 'Industrial Catholic Bugcore', surely a glorious name for a genre.
"Honey I'm Home" is a song featuring DEX, an English VOCALOID (voiced by Sam Blakeslee aka. Lupin) developed and distributed by Zero-G Limited in November 2015 for the VOCALOID4 engine. GHOST provided an explanation for the song on their Twitter after listeners requested one, but they encouraged self-interpretations. While the song has religious themes, it is not meant as a commentary on it.
According to Vocaloid Viki, this is the full explanation of the song:
"Norman Da Luz's father believes that "the World is an awful place" to be and that ascending to the afterlife would be equivalent to waking up from a nightmare. Under this philosophy he "mercy"-kills his wife.
Growing up with this mindset, Norman (Formerly known as Norman Minecraft, given this nickname by Vocaloid producer R.I.P. on GHOST's Patreon) questions whether things are real, as if the World is some elaborate set-up and in order to wake up one needs to pass away. He becomes a substance abuser to deal with this process but eventually decides that it's time to "grow up" and pull the plug, feeling that everyone would be alright if he could escape to the supposed real world.
Afterwards, he meets God and Charon. God confirms Norman's suspicions but clarifies that there's so much more to the situation than meets the eye. He advises Norman to stay by his side so he can show him the truth. But because Norman's father was essentially the heart of this reality, God "eats" father as both the notion of ending the simulation and taking his place as the new caretaker.
Charon instead offers him an easier way out by a kiss, which would poison him. Norman leaves everything behind, wanting to forget all about it, however, upon waking up, it is learned that in the real world Norman's body was being used for public vivisection in front of a large audience of angels."
Overview of characters
- Father (the mantis) is to reference the idea of "praying" and because female mantis' are known to sometimes consume their mates for sustenance. Norman's father is forcing the son though praying, which is why he is represented as a praying mantis. Whether this character is Norman’s literal father, one of the Christian aspects (God the Father), or merely a father figure, the ambiguity makes it all the more interesting, especially when considered to be the source of Norman’s distress. Regardless of reality, this character is representative of authority to Norman (or anyone).
- Norman "Minecraft" Da Luz (the moth) getting trapped by the spiderweb foreshadows what happens to Norman in the 'real world', that Norman's theories might be a way out. After dying by the spider's kiss the moth is seen attached to the right hand of God, this is viewed as a sign of blind trust and symbolizes being trapped.
- Charon (Greek God) is the carrier of souls that transports its passengers to the underworld. He serves a similar purpose in the song. He could also be seen as a portrayal of a lover in Norman's life, an escape door.
- The Three Voices are specifically talking about Norman, Charon, and God - the only real people who appear in this simulation and the ones who existed after its destruction.
The Angels at the end are described as NPCs, but as a group are just there to watch.
Line by Line Analysis
[Verse 1]
Father said that this world isn't for me
Following GHOST’s explanation, the Father believes that the world in an awful place and dying is like the equivalent of waking up from a nightmare. Equally, according to the YouTube description for the song Insecta Apostate, the main character Norman was raised to be the kind of person God wanted for an apprentice. A fake world was made to raise him in, so this line could’ve been foreshadowing. However this narrative universe is rather intricate and I believe that Norman’s father was telling Norman that he had somehow sinned. Perhaps through rebelling against any of his father’s or God’s ideals. Perhaps by being queer, or questioning God in any way.
I tried to pray for a new reality
"So, come to me, we can change night into day."
This may be a cult follower telling Norman that “God” is powerful enough to help him and(or) to give him the will to live. Alternatively there is an interpretation that I really like in which there is a “God” (therapist) who is introducing themselves to help. “Night into day” is most likely meaning we can change the bad into good.
A tied-up moth seemed to know a different way
This line links heavily with the first line and my interpretation, often marked as 'a bit of a stretch', that Norman has sinned in the eyes of Father and his religion. As we will discuss the moth is Norman himself and also the only creature with wings presented. In reality, moths are, on a small scale, considered harbingers of decay and destruction of old material, or in this case, destruction of belief. These wings represent freedom, which is of course limited by the fact that the moth is tied up. Norman 'knows a different way', which means that he doesn't follow or believe in the religion of Father at this point. The moth may also symbolise hope, maybe medication? Alternatively confirmed by GHOST, the moth is actually Norman who is tied up (to the right hand of God) as a blind sign of trust in him.
(Don't remember it, don't return to it)
An attempt to forget about the trauma collected throughout his life. A conscious thought that will link with Norman's alcoholism (presented a couple of lines ahead)
[Verse 2]
Oh, Father tore out the umbilical cord
Quoting Elegia Aquatica "The next line, “Father tore at the umbilical cord” is the primary reason why I connected moth and mother. An umbilical cord is a LITERAL connection to a person’s biological mother, both representing the forceful prevention from Norman returning to this hope, as well as forcing this child to mature, which can also be implied from the line “throw out the toys”
This causes Norman to turn to alternative methods of coping, and rather unhealthily building a reliance on alcohol to deal with his problems and depressing outlook on life. Simultaneously, Father is seeking escape from some event in the past. It is highly implied from the “rear view mirror” metaphor that Father is taking Norman along with his mistakes in the past. This makes the two of them out to be some sort of refugees, where either Father has committed some unforgivable sin and is avoiding his recompense, and/or is trying to prevent Norman from uncovering the truth of the world / God."
There's nothing left in the bottle keeping me scored
This is the reference to the character’s alcoholism that I have mentioned, stating “there isn’t any more alcohol to soothe me.”
As we know Norman drinks to cope, the pills next to him (in the PV) might be anti-depressants or pain killers.
We'll abandon the scenery in the
(Don't remember it, don't return to it)
Rear-view mirror
Leaving the past behind
[Chorus]
A petty line of white noise
This could be referencing the words of non-followers, which the cult views as “white noise”, which is incomprehensible, irritating when amplified, and unimportant in the eyes of many. How his reality was fake all along, nothing but a petty line of white noise.
Pack up your bags and throw out the toys
Three strikes, and "Honey, I'm home!"
Following GHOST’s explanation, “Honey I’m home” refers to how Norman spent the whole song/his whole life theorizing about getting out of the fake world and idolizing a real world and god he knew nothing about only to realize they were not much better than the fake ones. According to Genius Lyrics however, "three strikes can symbolize: 3 chances, 3 hits (abuse), or 3 bangs/knocks on the door, and in this case it’s most likely just 3 bangs/knocks on the door. This is most likely an important detail with those who deal with abuse, so 3 knocks on the door from their abuser coming home is bad news.
“Honey, I’m home!” is Norman’s father coming back home, and Norman is afraid of his abuse". The connection between “three strikes” and “three voices” may also be very important to our understanding of what exactly is going on here. “Three strikes,” specifically in baseball and the phrase “three strikes you’re out” implies some sort of limit, especially one that could point to a person’s own destruction and failure. Three sins were committed, and now Time is running out for these characters. The gramophone is a symbol of influence, but also an aged one. Gramophones are an outdated way of listening to music, and these three voices may serve as both a reminder of the happenings in the past, and the only voices/opinions Norman can hear about the world. His connection to other beliefs are very limited up until his encounter with the moth, which Father still attempts to prevent him from following.
Despite the desperate attempt to get away, this God figure tracks them down, revealing his horror-esque and emaciated form. The moth is then revealed to be a pawn piece of God’s control, implied when God repeats the very line the moth spoke, plus being chained to his hand can be a symbol of God trying to “reach out” to Norman. And what is the first thing this God does? He literally asserts his authority, belittling Norman’s knowledge of the universe and previous events while using this power to pull Norman to him at his will.
Quoting once more Elegia Acquatica for her amazing theory "Following the theme of growing up/maturity, “Honey I’m home” is a phrase used most stereotypically by men returning to their wives/families. This part is also clearly important, being the name of the song and all, and has a DRASTIC piece of insight on Norman’s character. In his constant attempts to escape the world he’s found, he really has no sense of belonging anywhere. This amplifies the temptation of the moth he encountered, because at his lowest “night,” he is so desperate to finally discover his “day” and newfound happiness. You could also say that a “home” is a place where someone feels they belong."
Three voices come from the gramophone
Referencing the 'Holy trinity' (the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit), which can be interpreted in the context of the song as Norman, Charon and God.
A vivisection of me
This line could actually be a visual allusion to the holy trinity. The Y Shaped scar that runs up the body and around the collar bones indicate the regions of your body you tap when symbolising the holy trinity (left shoulder, right shoulder, face). A vivisection separates your head and two halves in a similar way.
A line like this implies the nature of feeling all at once holy and tortured. Alternatively this line could be seen as a way to convey the analysis and criticism towards Norman.
Yielded the start of a mystery
Say "Hello! Honey, I'm home!"
Norman was originally made by angels (as stated in the description for the song Insecta Apostate), so by leaving the fake reality made for him he’s returning home.
Three voices come from the gramophone
[Verse 3]
God returned with the moth chained to his hand
Following GHOST’s explanation, the moth is actually Norman. Moth blindly follows a light and die, therefore it was used as a symbol of Norman’s blind faith in God. The chained part is about how he is basically trapped by God’s will.
"There's so many things that you'll never understand...
So, come to me, we can change night into day
You'll hold my hand, so you never go astray."
(God devoured that of Father)
Following GHOST’s explanation, God “eats” father both as a way to end the simulation of his world and become Norman’s caretaker. I personally believe that this is a clear reference to how religion consumed Father.
[Verse 4]
A spider preaching, with poison on its lips
"To get out of here is to promise me a kiss."
Charon is the role of the significant other. The kiss might mean “be in a relationship with me, and all your troubles can go away soon”. Charon is the nice, considerate s/o and Norman is finding happiness being with Charon, leaving some of his troubles behind, and Charon being another helping hand to help him on his mental heath journey. However it is also true that the poison on its lips suggests that the only way to escape this simulation is though death.
The abandonment of scenery in the...
Mind of Mother
Charon supports Norman's views which clearly differ from Father's.
(Don't remember it, don't return to it)
[Pre-Chorus]
So, with advice of the dead
Could either mean advice from the people he left/old friends, or his family members that passed away.
And a halo over my head
By wholly complying to “God” and his standards, Norman has become a “saint”, someone worthy of minimal respect.After being killed by Charon, Norman has now become an angel or another sort of spiritual being, while still being God’s ideal apprentice. Norman has found his hope, and he is an “angel”, he’s a better person
[Chorus]
At last, "Honey, I'm home!"
Three voices come all alone
Possibly the most important lines of the whole song. These may suggest two rather opposite theories: either DID or religious connotations; could also be three members of said cult manipulating him. Some argue that Norman having DID seems to be a bit of a stretch as it isn’t anything clearly depicted in the song and is a rather specific interpretation versus the religious interpretation that seems to be at the forefront (I do disagree with this point of view). This theory is sustained by nuances in the lyrics that seem to go against any clear indication of DID.
Also taking into account the fact that GHOST has already created the song ‘Candle Queen’ which had widely gained interpretation of cluster b disorders and it would be highly unlikely for them to create another song in that fashion. With this in mind, painting DID in such a religious light would probably not be something they would have in mind especially after such a run in with supposed mentions of mental disorders in their songs in the past. While I do agree that the religious connotations are very present, my theory is getting on a more personal level. Ghost themselves has DID (and publicly announced it on their Twitter), and I myself think that they input their experience/trauma within the song, and covers it by making it a song with different meanings and lyrics. Of course the whole HIH storyline isn’t going to be about their trauma, but this song is, and I no mean that Norman himself has DID, but the song is hinting at the intention of it.
There are many hints of abuse and personal experiences that can lead to and be a sign of DID, and emotional/mental trauma/illness in this song, thus my theory about a DID journey and finding out that you (Ghost) have DID.
Ghost has made many vent songs in the past, and wouldn’t be the same as Candle Queen because Ghost doesn’t have the cluster b disorder described in the song.
In conclusion I personally believe that the three voices represent DID.
Conclusion
So what exactly was this “plan” these characters had?
Perhaps, they were searching for a new god. We hear the line “three voices come all alone,” reflecting the earlier gramophone line as well as the three gods concept. Norman has become the next coming of god, quite unwillingly. Ironically, he’s finally found his “home,” somewhere he serves a purpose and would belong, but he sure does not seem happy. So what this seems to say about the character in the background is that this figure has been replaced. This is why the scene feels so distressing and concerning. For the change in the world and the change in religion, old leaders must be replaced by the new, and despite knowing nothing about who this character is, we can determine they were likely far less corrupt than God and the Spider. Had Father known this was Norman’s fate all along? Or did the two simply make use of what they had found?
So in brief summary, the corruption of ancient belief and authority can result in tragedy and pain for any subordinates to such a power. The world is simply an endless and vicious cycle of life, death, and the fact that the world will always move along without you. Even though Norman has supposedly ascended, he is still under control of God and possibly even the Spider, who have been there long before him and may even replace him should he step out of line.
Or at least this is the literal interpretation. I read somewhere a theory very little appreciated by the community, much more realistic and cold. In this theory, God is a therapist who has as his patient Norman, a young boy who suffers from DID and who suffered trauma in his childhood because of his family. Parents, potentially divorced, have different views in terms of religion, and those of the mother are more welcoming. However Norman's father had his custody, and consequently oppressed the young man to convert him into his religion. Many theories link this with the protagonist being homosexual or transgender, the latter being a theory particularly voted because of the angel presented at the end, with very androgynous characteristics that leave room for interpretation but that certainly recall the features of Norman. Regardless of the veracity of this whole hypothesis, there is no doubt that the song is about discrimination, whether it is religious or of any other kind. Regardless of the veracity of this whole hypothesis, there is no doubt that the song deals with discrimination, whether it is religious or of any other kind, clearly shown in the line 'this world isn't for me'.
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